


Sounded Silence

by Inanimatepony



Category: PaRappa the Rapper
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - Human, Childhood Memories, Childhood Trauma, Comfort/Angst, Drug Use, F/M, Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Marijuana, Mild Blood, Mild Gore, Mild Language, Multiple main characters, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Alternating, Self-Harm, Slow Burn, Smoking, Squick, Stress-induced self harm, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-03
Updated: 2018-09-23
Packaged: 2019-05-01 14:11:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 39
Words: 12,267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14522343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inanimatepony/pseuds/Inanimatepony
Summary: Life can throw things at you unexpectedly sometimes.Some things are good.Some things are bad.One cold and ill-fated day, life throws something bad at PJ, changing it possibly forever....





	1. I woke Up Like This

**Author's Note:**

> I had the idea to write this after reading about the death of Armsted Christian, PJ Berri's voice actor. It really broke me.

**PJ's POV**

I woke up a bit earlier than I usually do. Normally I'm up by noon, but today when I looked at the clock, it read 10:00. Weird. 

I finally got out of bed a quarter after. Although, I was still a little groggy, so my sense of direction didn't kick in fully: I nearly tripped after bumping into my record shelf, knocking a few singles off.

**But this story is just beginning.**

When I opened my mouth to shout in pain, _nothing came out._

I tried to say "What?" but still nothing.

My breathing grew heavy and quick. I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs, but it only sounded like a dry heave. What happened to me that suddenly made me...mute?

I need to find someone. _Anyone_. _**Where was Parappa at this hour?**_


	2. On the Other Side of Town

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parappa and Sunny find out what's wrong with their friend, and try to help him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Expect a POV shift each chapter.

**Parappa's POV**

Fruites Cafè.

I've worked here part-time for a while now. It's my day off today, but I came in anyway. 

_To have breakfast with my lovely Sunny Hunny._

Her sweet smile. Her cotton candy hair. Every little thing about her gets me going. That's why these kinds of dates with her are my favorite. I even pay for it out of my own paycheck. 

We had just finished everything. I hugged her tightly while she kissed me on the cheek. The very moment we released our grips, something grabs me from behind. 

 

It's PJ. What's he doing up so early?

"Hey, PJ...what's up?" Escapes my lips in a worried tone. He looks up and at me dead in the eyes. 

"Are you...crying?!" I kneel down, meeting his level. He opened his mouth, as if to say something, but then buried his face in my chest. Sunny is still here, just as concerned as I am. 

"PJ, please, just tell us," Sunny says, "We've never seen you cry this much ever since you found out Phat Donut quit serving those crueller things."

Without hesitation, he pulls out his phone and types furiously. Both Sunny's and my text alerts go off. 

 

_I Don't know why or how, but I can't talk! I just woke up like this. I'm scared..._

The three of us huddle together. PJ needs to be with someone. He's scared of what this might do to him.

"You think you need a doctor?" Sunny asks. PJ nods furiously.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a headcanon in here: "Sunny Hunny" is Parappa's pet name for Sunny Funny.


	3. Waiting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PJ is taken to a doctor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can I just talk to you readers through this?

**PJ's POV**

The waiting room at the doctor's office was rather desolate. I didn't like it. (Of course, I didn't like it when it was crowded, either.)

Parappa was sitting next to me, holding Sunny's hand. The look fixed onto Parappa's face appeared as a mix of worry and what some people call "resting bitch face." His free hand supported his head while his thumb rolled around his cheek. He had every right to be as worried as I was.  _He's been like a brother to me._  We've known each other _practically since we were babies._

Out of the sheer need of a hug, I nuzzled into Parappa's arm as if I were a cat. I squeezed his chest and felt him seize at my surprising amount of muscle. He squeezed mine even tighter in response. His breathing got shaky, as if he was crying. He _was_ crying.

"I'm...sorry..." he choked out. 

I have so much to say to him, but I can't. I wanna tell him that I'll pull through. I wanna tell him to just worry about Sunny. I wanna tell him it will all be ok.

...

The nurse calls my name.


	4. I Need A Doctor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang receive news from the doctor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're still on PJ's POV. For the most of it, anyway.

"Parlin Joseph Berri?"

The nurse calls my name.  _God, how I hate my full name._  Never really got used to being called either of those. 

***    *    ***

"You're not due for a check-up until August," remarks the doctor, "What brings you in so early?"

I hold my mouth, and nod towards Parappa.

Parappa sighs, "From what he's told us...he somehow can't talk. All we know is, he hasn't done anything that couldn't caused this, and he's really scared."

"You sure you don't remember doing anything that could've caused this?" the doctor asked. I nod my head. The Doctor tells me to open my mouth, which I do. After looking inside, he pulls out a swab.  _God how I hate when they do that._

***   *   ***

Parappa is holding Sunny's hand again. His head is hanging low, and I can tell he's trying his hardest not to get worked up: the doctor hasn't even come back with the results yet. I lay down on the exam table, the crinkle of the parchment atop it somewhat easing me.

The doctor comes back.

"As much as it baffles me to say this, you-"

"Give it to me, doc!" Parappa interupts. His breathing is shaky. He kneels on the floor, burying his face in his knees. 

"...no disease could've caused this," the doctor continued, "I'm no neurologist, but I think it might a weakened nerve that shut off your ability to talk..."

_**What**_?

 

I fell off the exam table, right next to Parappa. I squeeze his chest, and he squeezes mine. 

 

***  *  ***

**Parappa's POV**  

"PJ....buddy...." my voice was trembling, "I'm so sorry..." 

I began crying like a baby. PJ bit my shoulder, but I was too busy bawling to react.


	5. That Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PJ tries breaking the news to a close friend. It doesn't get received well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters in one night! (Well, it was nighttime for me when I wrote this)

**PJ's POV**  

I distraughtedly went to my night gig at Club Fun. Deejays don't really talk unless it's necessary, so maybe it won't be such a big deal. 

The request box was chock full of cards,  so I randomly pulled one out. 

_"Play Hurricane by The Fray._ "

_I know that handwriting. It's Paula's._ We've been dating off and on, but she still needs to know. I randomly pull a record out and play it on the turntable before slipping down and making my way though the crowd to find her. 

When I spotted her, I waved my arms recklessly. Then I realized her gaze wasn't fixed on anything. One option sparked inside my brain: **run.** And so I did. When I stopped running, I trapped Paula in a cicada block, my head just barely touching her breasts. 

"What's got you so antsy, party boy?" She says in an almost deadpan tone. I look her dead in the eyes, barely seeing my stressed and exhausted reflection in them. 

I wanted to pull out my phone, since it was the only way I could explain this, but then I remembered I left it on the turntable. It was my way of freestyling. I just opened my mouth at pointed my finger in it.

"What does that mean?" Paula asked, "you sick or somethin'?"

My face went red.  Before I could do anything, a hand touches my shoulder.

"Ey! Stop flirtin'!" The voice and hand belonged to King Kong Mushi, the head of Club Fun. He pulls on the neck of my jacket and drags me back to the turntable. 

I frantically searched for my phone. I type as fast as my hot fingers could:

" _I've got nerve damage that shut off my speech. In other words, I can't talk!"_

When I look up, Paula is standing there in front of me. I hear her phone buzz, and she pulls it out to read my message.

_**Her phone slips out of her hand.** _

_**She picks it up and bolts away.** _


	6. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PJ comes home after a long night. To his surprise, someone is waiting for him.

"Hey, man...wake up...ya fell asleep on the turntable again."

King Kong Mushi was right next to me, rubbing my back. Boy, he looked like he had a fun night. Not me, though: my head was pounding like a tribal drum, and my mouth reeked of beer and donuts.  _I couldn't even stand up, I felt so out of it._

"Need a ride home?" Mushi asked. I couldn't ask if he was sober or not, so I just nodded yes. 

When we made our way to Mushi's car, I just plopped down in the back seat. I didn't even bother to put on a seatbelt. Once you lay down in King Kong Mushi's car, you realize how disgusting this man really is. The slight stench of marijuana, Chunky Burger wrappers all over the floor, stains from you don't even wanna know where in the fuck they came from, grocery bags filled with ripe vomit, I could go on for a long time. But I don't care about this pigsty he calls his car. I just wanna go home. No one can bare with riding with him, and I was no exception. The moment the engine started, I blew chunks out the window. There go those donuts I mentioned earlier. I sank down in the back seat, letting the motion of the car lull me to sleep.

***  *  ***

"Hey, get up. We're at your house."

Mushi's voice woke me up again. I could still taste my episode of vomiting. A Chunky Burger wrapper was stuck to my foot.  _I just wanted to get inside my house and clean myself up_. 

When I got a good look of my house, Paula was sitting on the steps, almost nodding off. 

I knelt down to where she sat, gently patting her back. 

"...hi PJ..." she groaned. I helped her stand up, then walked her inside. 


	7. Can We Just "Talk?"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PJ tries to run things down with Paula. Turns out Paula has news of her own.

**PJ'S POV**

I really needed a shower. 

I had Paula sit on my collapsed couch before I did anything else. 

"Where you goin'?" She asks. I point in the direction that my bathroom is in. She just makes a "tsk" noise and turns on the TV. I roll my eyes and continue on my way.

 

**Paula's POV**

Nothing good is on TV today. Does this guy even have cable? 

Turning my focus away, I could hear running water in the next room. I would call him rude for taking a shower while he had company, but I'm not blaming him. He looked like he really needed one.

***  *  ***

When he came back into the living room, he had a notepad in his hands. Without thinking, I shifted positons on the couch, laying my legs in his lap. He glanced at me weirdly, then began scribbling on the notepad. When he finishes, he hands it over to me.

_Do you remember that text I sent you last night_?

Last night? I don't remember that at all. PJ looks at me, takes the notepad back, and scribbles some more on it.

_Why did you check your phone and run away_?

Without another word, I check my phone again. His message is there. If I remember getting that, would I have really reacted like that?

**Then it hit me**. 

I didn't run away because of that.

"PJ..." I sigh, "there's a different reason as to why I did that..."

He suddenly pulls me in close. I hang my head low. Here goes nothing.

_"...I think I might be pregnant_."


	8. Wait, What?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is Paula really pregnant?

**PJ's POV**

I pull her in close, and she hangs her head low. She looks up at me, my worried expression reflecting in her deep purple eyes _._

_"I think I might be pregnant."_

_**What**?_

My thoughts are off the racetrack at this point. I wanna yell at her. We're not even that close, why does she think this? 

"I'm sorry," she sighs, "just seems everything in life is so sudden now, isn't it?  I mean, you've lost your ability to speak, for one, and I-I think,-" she cuts herself off and hides her face in a dirty pillow. I gently pat her back: it feels like it's the only thing I can do at this point. When she lifts her head back up, an instinct kicks in, and I squeeze her.

"PJ, I'm sorry...I don't know what to do either."

***  *  ***

I held Paula's hand the way Parappa holds Sunny's hand. I know I said we're not that close, but I feel like I'm getting closer to her. Her thumb is in her mouth, most likely out of nervousness. I wanna tell her that whatever will happen next, I'll help her figure something out. 

The doctor comes back. 

"How do you want me to break this to you, Ms Fox?" He asked.

"Just tell me," Paula makes her point clear, "no bullshit. Am I... _am I pregnant or not?"_

"...you are, Ms. Fox."

I hold Paula tight. There really is a child, if not mine, inside of her.

 


	9. Sweet Nightmares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A glimpse of what PJ dreamed about that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair Warning, this chapter get pretty gorey.

**No set POV**

A vast kingdom. Streets paved in gilded rock candy, lampposts made of twizzlers, sugar glass bulbs in every lamp, rivers of lemon-lime soda, everything is food!

Who would rule such a tasty land, you may ask? Our king is none other than the plump PJ Berri. Everybody loves him! He's the best king there ever was! He comes onto the scene now, bringing his brand new queen, Paula. 

"Attention, attention! King PJ and his new queen Paula are coming this way!  They have great news!" cheers the squire.

King PJ opens his mouth to speak, but alas, nothing. The crowd of citizens murmurs in shock. He tries to speak again, but still nothing. He smacks a hand on his mouth, his freckled face blushing a deep rose. When he removes his hand, it's colored a deeper red. He kneels down, using his staff for support. He throws a coughing fit, blood spurting out of his mouth. The citizens run away in fear, the gathering hall is desolate. He throws up a bloody bile of chewy donuts. Now his queen has left him! He glances down, discovering he's suddenly wearing nothing but his crown and robe. The skin on his chest is melting away, exposing his sticky rib cage, along with his rapidly beating heart, off-color lungs, and seemingly black upper digestive tract. It thunders and pours down rain as his abdomen splits open, spilling his blackened intestines. He frantically tries to pick them up put them back where they came, but the lengthy ropes of gut just keeps spilling out, eventually kinking as if they were a 20-foot hose. The putrid acid burns his hands.

Eventually, he just gives up and falls to the bloodied ground, accepting his messy fate.

 

***  *  ***

PJ woke up suddenly, drenched in cold and sticky sweat.


	10. Stressed Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sunny does her best to calm Parappa down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We interupt this angst and bring you fluff.~

**Sunny's POV**

Parappa is pacing behind the couch that I'm sitting on. This whole ordeal with PJ is really starting to take a toll on him. He stops at the door, bangs his head on it, then plops down on the couch.

"You OK?" _What a stupid question for me to ask. He's not ok._ He just huffs in response, then takes off his beanie. I scooch closer to him, trying to get words out of him. When he looks over at me, his expression goes neutral. I grab the end of his ponytail and begin to fiddle with it.

"Stop that," he sighs, "that's not helping anything." My arm falls on his shoulder. 

"You heard anything from PJ lately?" I ask absent-mindedly. 

"Apparently Paula's living with him now," he finally responds,  "she's pregnant or somethin'."

"Oh?" I cock my head as if I were a puppy.

"Yeah, I think he's still wrapping his mind around that one, too. They...they never really were that close to begin with..."

I kiss him on the cheek. He looked like he needed that.

"Thanks," he chuckled.

"I love you," I say while hugging him.

He hugs me back. "Love you too."


	11. Should've Brought a Gun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A restless Parappa goes out to try and calm himself. Little does he know, an old enemy is waiting for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair warning: this chapter gets rather violent.   
> And no one in this chapter is mentioned by name unless in dialogue.

**No Set POV**

It's a bustling night at Club Fun. The auburn haired DJ is running the turntable again, sometimes using his phone to freestyle.

The club's owner, an overweight black male most likely in his early 40s, is accompanied by two other males, one also black and the other Hispanic. They enjoy themselves with some herb. 

Not much later, a young adult Caucasian male joins in.

"Parappa!" The owner heartily laughs, "I hardly recognize ya without that hat!"

"Hahaha, whassup my man?" The Hispanic one is completely zonked out. The third party member is too busy with his pipe to even notice anything.

"Don't talk to me," the young adult scoffs.

The owner tips his shades briefly.

"Pass me one, Mushi. I'm having a rough night."

It didn't take long for the drug to affect the young adult. The minute it reached his brain, his hands tingle as he witnesses them morph into paws. He holds his head when a migraine hits it, feeling long ears underneath his hair. It suddenly smelled like dog.

"Yo, Parappa, you ok? You've never had _that much_ before."

The young adult coiled once he heard that voice. It belonged to Club Fun's owner, but the drug in the young adult's system was portraying him as a large, purple tick. 

"I-I said don't talk to me!" The young adult snapped, "Go away!" 

The young adult started barking loudly, which, if you're not seeing what he is, makes him look rather stupid.

 

**** time skip, one hour later. ****

The young adult sneaks out of Club Fun, his hair covering his slightly red eyes. He isn't super high, but it was enough to ease him. The terrible migraine is still shooting at his head.

As he makes his way back home, someone grabs him by his hoodie and pulls him in an alleyway. He lets out a worried gasp.

"Well, well, well!" a shrill voice mocks him, "if it isn't Parappa Rappa! What are you up to these days, huh?!"

The young adult's vision clears up. Before him is a tall, skinny, rugged adult male, who-knows-how much older than him. His face is covered by a rabbit mask.

"Ga-Gaster?" The young adult gasps, "I-I thought you've been in prison since I was in college!"

"Escaped," another voice bellows, this one a deep cockney accent, "They don' jus let our kind out like that."

The ambusher had a partner. Build-wise, he was the exact opposite: short, plump, and a little bit wiser. He iswearing a cat mask.

The black-haired male begins hyperventilating. Those two could hold a grudge against him until the end of time:  _he_ was the very reason they got arrested.

"Pat him," the skinnier, shrill voiced male snips. His partner searches the hyperventilating young adult. "Nothin'," the plump one states, "not even a wire."

" _ **What?!**_ " the skinny one shrieks. He pulls out a switchblade, grabs the black hair over his victim's eyes, and hacks it off, scratching his temple and forehead in the process. No doubt about it, he was mad.

The young adult is practically being held against his will. He starts crying. The plumper one pulls out his knife and slashes the crier's leg, just below his knee. "Stop that, or we're  _really_  give ya somethin' to cry about!"

All seems hopeless. They have knives: he has nothing. Then he remembers.

_Kick, Punch, it's all in the mind._

_Don't get cocky: It's gonna get rocky._

_He knows karate._

_Karate must only be used for self defense._

_What better time than right now?_

The skinny male gets kicked right in his crotch. He lets go of his victim, falling to the concrete.

His partner ambushes the black-haired male by pouncing on his back. He is suddenly top heavy. He tries grabbing the weight off, but his hand is slit. He tries slapping it off, but his cheek is slit.His back gets a huge slice carved in in, causing him to fall on the concrete.

_The he sees the skinny one dropped his knife._

The young adult grabs it as fast as he can, then slices the plump one's eye, causing him to let go. When finally free, the young adult runs.

 

*** * ***

** *BREAKING NEWS!!!* **

_Just outside of Club Fun, a fight has been reported. Although it was two against one, the person that the two thugs were holding against his will managed to win. He appears nowhere on the scene, but police have identified the two others as two of Parappa Town's most wanted criminals, violating several cases of kleptomania and illegal drug distribution. They have been arrested and are suspect to face a 20-to-life prison sentence._

_This was Rodney Greenblat, reporting live from Club Fun in Parappa town._


	12. Fix You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parappa comes home after a bloody battle.

**~~~~Sunny's POV**

I was awoken by a loud thud repeatedly coming from downstairs. I had to investigate: Parappa wasn't there with me.

_He was at the door. He looked like a hobo._

_**"PARAPPA! IT'S 3 IN THE MORNING! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?!** "_ I uncontrollably yell in his face. He looks up, burps, then picks up a clay pot, only to violently vomit in it. (Sorry, Grandma...)

He stumbles inside to find the couch and plop on it, screaming into the pillow on the arm. 

"Look, I'm sorry I exploded like that," I apologize, "it's just so late and you weren't-" I stop mid-sentence when I noticed that, while I was rubbing his back, I get blood on my hand. There's a huge slice carved in his back, not so well hidden behind his unkempt hair. "Sit up," I tell him. He does, and I ease the bloodstained hoodie and shirt off of him. His arm, hand, and face are also slit. His body and breathing are shaky.

"Oh my god...Parappa, what happened?!"

Tears roll down his face. He winces when his tears get into the wound on his cheek

"I just.." he chokes on his tears, "I just went out to tire myself, but-but these two guys found me, and-and-" he stops mid-sentence and makes his crying audible. He suddenly pulls up his right pants leg, revealing another gash below his knee. "They had knives..." he chokes out again, "they got me pretty good...I'm sorry I woke you up looking like this!"

He's crying like a baby.

Without another word, I leave to get a first-aid kit. He needs a good cleaning up.

"Hey, hey...it's ok..." I try to calm him down, "I know things are looking bad, and I know it keeps you up at night, just..." I get a good look at his face. His eyes are red. It didn't seem like he was crying that long.

"Did you go to 'have fun' with Mushi?"

He nods. "I'm sorry...it was all I could think of..."

"Takes a big man to admit his mistakes."

I start cleaning up his wounds, starting with his face. Once I dab a peroxide-soaked cotton ball at him, he winces again.

"You are such a baby," I softly chuckle, "It doesn't sting  _that_  bad."

He just pouts at me.

It took a good thirty minutes for me to fix him up: those cuts seemed so minor at first, but they were actually pretty deep. The slice in his back, though, that's another story. I was afraid we'd have to resort to getting him stitches: thankfully that wasn't the case.

"Feel any better?" A stupid question, I know, but he's pretty sore.

He just looks me dead in the eyes, then pulls me in by my arms.

"Sunny..oh, my sweet Sunny Hunny," he says, "I cannot thank you enough! I know you'll always love me, even if I go out and do stupid shit like this, I just-" he stops, and looks down.

" _ **God, I love you so fucking much**_."

Without hesitation, he kisses me. Passionately. On the lips. His breath is rancid, but I don't care. _This is a moment to seize._  His weight pushes me down. His foot is tapping restlessly, and his heart is pounding as if it would burst out of his chest and into mine. He's not usually this good a kisser: he must be happy to know I was there. Suddenly, I feel something poke at me.  _Oh, Parappa, you just can't contain yourself, can you?_

"GAH!" he pulls away in shock, "I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me..." His face is glowing read and his legs are crossed. I hear him yell  _"Down, boy!"_ through gritted teeth.

"Come upstairs," I giggle while patting his shoulder, "You need to rest."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha boner joke


	13. A Rundown of Everything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parappa visits PJ for once, and discusses situations with Paula.

**Parappa's POV**

_I barely remember last night_.

What I do know is, whatever I did, or how high I was, Sunny was there for me. 

_God, I love that woman_. 

I took a look at myself in the mirror. I was wrapped in so many bandages I nearly felt like a damn mummy. 

_Oh my, Parappa_ , I heard my dad's voice echo in my brain, _what have you gotten yourself into?_

The bandages wrapped on me were crusted in blood stains, and they itched really bad. I pick at them some, but a voice intrudes and scares me.

"Par, please don't mess with those," Sunny sighs as she enters, "you had quite a rough night. Why'd you think I let you sleep in?"

The clock on the wall read 1:33pm. Letting me sleep in this late almost seemed _too nice,_ even for Sunny Funny standards: I must've come home really late. Sunny grabs my right hand and unravels the cotton tape on it. A habit kicks in, causing me to squeeze her hand once mine is free. 

"You are such a dork," Sunny chuckles. My face goes bright rose, "Try your best not to use this one, ok?" I squeeze her when she finishes. "You do so much for me," I say in a low voice.

***  *  ***

PJ's house isnt the prettiest sight, but then again, he was never the tidiest person I've known. It felt good knowing I was visiting him for once. These past few days he's just been coming to me, and we both needed a change. I knocked at least six times before getting impatient. 

"Yo! Anybody in here?!" I yelled, "It's Parappa." 

Paula was the one to answer the door. Her hair was tied into a bandanna, and she wore one of PJ's Club Fun hoodies. Given his larger build, it looked quite massive on her. 

"I know what you're trying to hide," slips out of my mouth, "PJ told me." 

Paula just hangs her head in shame. "Niether of us know how it why...this happened," she motions at her stomach, "life is just so sudden for the both of us at this point." 

She didn't even mention my bandages. Weird.

"Can I come in?" I slowly ask.

"I guess. Mind the clutter, though: the lump on the couch refuses to help me clean up a bit."

PJ was sound asleep on his collapsed couch. I wanted to wake him up, but a note was stuck on his arm that read "Long night. Don't bother me." _You and me both, buddy_. 

"You need any help?" I absent-mindedly asked Paula. She glares at me and throws a broom to me. I know Sunny told me to try and not use my right hand, but I needed to do some good things to try and rule out all this shit life is throwing at us. It just feels right. 

"What's got you looking so roughed up?" Paula finally noticed I was wearing bandages in various places.

"I don't remember," I try to think, "but I know I went out last night because I was tense."

"You weren't at Club Fun, were ya? Heard on the radio some street thugs broke out of prison and assaulted a passerby, but said passerby beat 'em up and ran off."

_Then it hit me._

_I_  was the passerby. 

_I_  beat up Gaster and his buddy. 

_I_ ran away.

"Um! Earth to Parappa!" Paula snapped me back. 

"...I was there..." I said half still in a trance.

"Huh?!"

"They had knives...I felt helpless...I remembered my karate lessons as a last result...that's what these bandages are for..."


	14. Family Matters (I)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PJ visits his parents to explain everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to put something here but I lost it.

**PJ's POV**

They say home is where the heart is, but there almost wasn't one where I grew up. My father left when I was 7, and actually came back when I was 12. My mother is a wreck because of it. Despite me almost being a reminder of him, she cherished me greatly, and almost didn't want me to move out. It took a lot of courage to actually go up to that door.

_My mother was the one to answer._

As soon as she sees me, she squeezes me tightly and pulls me into the house. 

"Parlin, I'm so glad you came back!" She yells as if heartbroken.  She's actually crying. I can do nothing except squeeze her back. The feeling I get in my throat whenever I wanna yell is back, and even though I don't wanna release my grip, I do. I frantically search for a notepad. When I do, my hand scribbles wildly. 

" _My nerves are damaged. I lost my voice and I'm not getting it back. A friend I used to date is pregnant."_

She kisses my forehead, as mothers do. I end off with writing, "Life is so sudden, now."

"It really is, isn't it? She chuckles then sighs. She buries her face in her hands and cries again. I tear off part from the notepad and hand it to her.

" _What's wrong?"_

"I tried to reach you, but I didn't think you would take it like I did..." she chokes on her tears. I hold her in a death grip.

"Your father passed away a couple of weeks ago."


	15. Family Matters (II)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Paula comes home to discuss events.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the misleading chapter titles, there are four main characters, and I'm planning on exploring how each of their families handle them explaining the situations at hand. Having said that, read on.

**Paula's POV**

There I am, just sitting in my childhood living room. My mother's in the kitchen, and I don't know where my father is. The table is dusty, there's no cable, and the stairs' railing is still busted from that incident I had with my brothers as a kid. _I grew up in a dump, and it was the only reason I could tolerate living in PJ's craphole._

"Everything ok, sweetie?" My mom comes into the living room with milkshakes. I restlessly stirred at it with my straw.

"Where's dad?" I sigh, "I wanna talk about this with the both of you." 

"Probably asleep."

***time skip, 3:37pm***

"So, you wanna run this down with the both of us, huh?" My dad sighs heavily as he plops down on the empty seat next to me.

I sigh heavily. People take news differently. How would _they_ take it? Words couldn't come out of my mouth. 

"It's ok," my mom reassures, "you can tell us anything."

"You know PJ?" I finally speak, "auburn hair, always sleepy, smells like stale donuts?"

"I thought you said you two weren't ' _official_ ,'" my dad replies in a deadpan tone. We exchange looks.

"Well...we kind of are, now. Not long ago we discovered he lost his voice and can't get it back..." My head hangs low. 

"Does he need someone to help communicate?" My mom asks. I don't answer, still thinking things through. 

"There's something else you should know, too..." I finally let out. 

Both of them lean into me.

"You're...You're gonna be grandparents!" Those words just flew out of my mouth.


	16. Family Matters (III)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A bummed Parappa stays at home for a few nights, as a way to get away from it all.

**Parappa's POV**

_It's good to be back._

I was back in the more suburban part of Parappa Town. No noise, no bright lights, no busy people, no nothing. I seriously needed a break from life, and going back to where I began was perfect. I went to ring the doorbell, but someone was there waiting for me.

"BIG BROTHER!" my young sister, Pinto, greeted me with a bear hug. She was suddenly taller than me, not by much, and it felt weird: _I_  was always the tall one.

"Hey, sis!" I chuckle while ruffling her hair, "how's school treatin' ya?"

"Bro, I'm in college!" she laughs, "I signed up online last year."

It's been so long since I've seen her, I knew I had to do some catching-up with my folks. Pinto is looking at my duffel bag and pondering. 

"Oh, can you get mom and dad?" I snap back into reality. She nods, then darts off, prompting me to let myself in. As I look around, I notice Pinto's been playing on "my" GameCube again (I say it like that because when I introduced her to Animal Crossing she hasn't let me touch it)

I finally settle down in the kitchen after grabbing a coke from the fridge. It tasted flat, like someone wanted it then changed their mind. 

"Hey, hey, big guy!" my dad pats me on the back, "what's got you back so soon?"

I assumed that he noticed the duffel bag still on my shoulder. He said that last part like I haven't been gone for more than a week, when in reality it's actualy been two years. 

"It's just...stuff has been going on between my friends and I wanted to get away: my first instinct just so happened to be coming back here." I let out a deep sigh. My mom is holding my left arm, inspecting the cotton tape. 

"What did you do...?" her gentle voice eases me, "you weren't in a fight, were you?!"

"Not exactly," I answer in a low voice, "hear in the news about the two jailbirds trying to mug someone but he beat em up and ran off?"

Everybody nods.

"Their victim was me. Took a little bit of a beating." 

Everyone suddenly hugs me. My mom is crying, my dad has a death grip on me, and my sister is sitting on my lap like she did when we when younger.


	17. Family Matters (IV)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sunny invites her father over to fill in for the absence of her bummed lover.

**Sunny's POV**

As I'm watching TV, I hear the purr of a car pull in. I know exactly who it is.

My father, the famed, retired General who had a hand in stopping the Noodle Syndicate, James "Potter" Funny. Rather than let him reach the door, I bolted out to greet him.

"Somebody's missed me!" He heartily laughs when I bear hug him. I had nearly forgotten how burly he was: even moreso impressed he kept that way at his age. I grab his hand and lead him inside.

*** * ***

"Where's that boyfriend o' yours?" He asks once he settles down, "writin' songs in the garage again?"

"Well, no..." I sigh, "remember PJ?"

He nods slowly, like he does whenever he knows bad news is heading his way.

"Something's...PJ lost his voice and can't get it back, and it's really taking a toll on Parappa: he's known him longer than he's known me. He's gone back to live with his family until he can get his head straight..."

I scoot closer to him.

"I'm just...really worried about him."

He pats my back, sighing.

"I'm glad you don't drink or smoke."


	18. Hey, Brother

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pinto gives her older brother some love and condolences.

**Parappa's POV**

Tonight is a beautiful one. Reminds me of my first real date with Sunny. 

Too bad I'm alone on my roof. 

The smell of the outdoors is nice, at least. 

I take out a glass tube from my duffel bag, filling it with herb. I need to ease my mind again.

"Bro," a voice intrudes as I flick a lighter. It's Pinto. I hide the tube in my pants and swivel towards her.

"Hey sis," I attempt a boisterous reply, "what are you doing up late?"

"Bro. I'm 19. I can be up as late as I want." 

"Right, right. Sorry. Been a couple of years since I've seen ya. How old were you when I moved out? 16?"

Pinto is giving me a stinkeye as she pokes her head out the window. She motions me to come back inside. 

"So, why _are_ you back?" Pinto asks me as she sits on my lap. She's getting a little big for this, but I know she loved it when she was little, so I just let her do it.

"You remember my bud PJ, right?" I sigh.

She nods.

"Well, something's happened, and I just need to-"

"Are you dating him now or something?"

" **Pinto, I live with Sunny**."

She giggles, as if she was toying with me.

"PJ...lost his voice..."

"So?"

"So?! HE'S NEVER GONNA GET IT BACK! WE'RE TALKING NERVE DAMAGE HERE!"

I fall on my bed, crying my eyes out. 

"PJ...buddy...I've known you forever...I wanna help..."

Pinto wiggles between my arms. "You look like you need a hug."

I hold her in a death grip.

"Thanks, sis."

"Everything ok in here?" My mom asks.

"It's OK, mom," Pinto says, "I can handle him."

Dead silence fills my room. My sister knows me better than anyone else, even my own parents. 

As I fell asleep, I thought about all my memories with PJ.


	19. When I Met You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parappa and PJ's early years of friendship.  
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter where no is mentioned by name unless in dialogue. (Parappa is known as "Cowan, a misspelled anagram of "Wanko," Japanese for "dog" because as humans, a lot of characters have "Unofficial" name changes

**No Set POV**

*Plink! Plink! Plink!*

A little black-haired boy was banging a xylophone, much to the Preschool Teacher's annoyance. 

"Cowan, sweetie, why don't you give that a rest?" The teacher asks him. The boy just grabs the xylophone and holds it close to his chest. 

"Or, maybe not..."

The plinking continues. The boy is bumped in the back by a red-haired boy, about a year older than him. 

"Can you knock it off?!" The redhead groggily commands.

"Parlin, be nice!" the teacher raises her voice slightly, "and it's not even nap time yet."

"Is it snack time yet?" The redhead gets up off his back.

"Not yet. Almost, sweetie."

The plinking stopped. The black-haired little boy scoots over to the sleepy redhead. 

"Sorry," the black haired boy says, "it's just one of my favorite toys!"

"Mine's the kitchen!" The redhead replies, "too bad I can't eat anything there...my tummy's empty."

"You're funny!" the black-haired boy giggles, "my name is Cowan, what's yours?"

"My daddy calls me PJ."

The black-haired boy lets go of the xylophone. "Wanna play?"

"Sure!"

The plinking continues. The teacher is annoyed yet again. "It was fun while it lasted..." she sighs.

 _Just like that, the little black haired boy made his first friend_.


	20. My First Sleepover

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A seven-year-old PJ, stressed out by family drama, runs away to his best friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another flashback chapter! Characters are finally mentioned by name.

**No Set POV**

"I'm not FUCKING DRUNK!" 

An overweight male yells at his wife. Their auburn-haired boy is cowering in fear from the other room. He wonders why his father is like this.

"Why did you even start this?!" The woman yells. Their son was no older than 7, but he knew to stay out of this. What did his father do? What did his mother do? 

What did  _he_ do?

The sounds of glass breaking and hard thuds come from the kitchen. The boy can't bear to see his parents fight like this. He starts crying. He runs to his room. 

He pulls a backpack from his closet, fills it with clothes, opens the window, and runs. He needs to stay as far away from this as possible.

 

*** * ***

Cowan is sitting on his couch, playing Wave Race on his Nintendo 64. His parents are busy with his 16-month-old sister, so he needed to occupy himself. The doorbell rings. Since his parents are nowhere to be seen, he answers it.

"Hi, PJ!" Cowan greets his redheaded friend.

"Hey, can I stay here a few nights?" PJ responds.

"Like a sleepover?" Cowan cocks his head.

"Kind of."

"Wait here." 

Cowan runs to find his parents.

"Mama?! Papa?! PJ's here!"

"Could you keep it down?" His father approaches him and responds, "it's Pinto's nap time."

"Sorry," Cowan's voice goes soft, "PJ's at the door and wants to know if he can sleep over."

"Are his parents ok with it?"

"I didn't see his parents."

Cowan meets PJ back at the door, his father tagging along.

"Where are your parents, PJ?" Cowan's father asks the redhead. 

"They're...back at home...yelling at each other..." escapes PJ's mouth, "don't even know I'm gone...I don't wanna be in the middle of all that..." he breaks down to tears and hugs Cowan's father.

"I'm sorry to hear that..." Cowan's father consoles PJ, "you are a little young to be running away like this, but if you need a place to stay away from family drama..."

Cowan looks at his father with puppy-dog eyes.

"...you're more than welcome to stay here."

"SLEEPOVER!" Cowan excitably yells.

"Cowan, shush! Remember Pinto!"

PJ cocks his head.

"Oh, I have a sister now."


	21. We Can Work It Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PJ consoles an upset Paula.

**PJ's POV**

Paula is crying in my chest. She has every right to be upset: she's confused about what she should do. I wanna talk to her, I wanna tell her that we can work out all this mess.

 _To be honest, I wanna cry too_. My father just passed away, and I didn't know about it until just the other day.

"They...they disowned me..." she cries out, "I'm...I'm not ready to commit my life to you...I don't wanna marry someone I don't know if I love or not!"

She looks me dead in the eyes, hers red from crying so much.

" **I don't wanna get rid of this child**."

A very bold statement of hers to make.

"But...are we fit to raise it?"

I find my notepad, then write, "We're gonna be fine. Family isn't always perfect." 

"Are you sure?" Her voice sounded as if it was breaking.

I nod. Paula squeezes my chest.

_The fact that we've come this far, it bewilders me. We never even given our relationship deep thought._


	22. On My Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flashback chapter: Paula is always deep in thought about something, and Matt will not rest until he finds out what.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Go and watch the Parappa anime if your absolutely clueless.

**No Set POV**

Paula was stuck in dreamland yet again.  Everything was perfect. 

"Um! Earth to Paula!" Katy snapped her back in reality. Paula lightly punched Katy in the chest. 

"She's so into it when she daydreams," Matt muttered toward Parappa,  "wonder what she thinks about."

Parappa wasn't listening: his nose was stuck in his Gameboy. Matt rolled his eyes and turned to Paula. Her face was pink.

"So, uh, Paula..." Matt began, trying to make conversation, "What's been on your mind?"

"Like you need to know," Paula snipped. Matt huffed in response. What would it take to reach her?

"Hey, Parappa, can you-"

Matt stopped himself when he realized Parappa was still stuck in his Gameboy. His look turned to annoyance, then snatched it clean out of his hands.

"Give it back!" Parappa cried out, "I was on a 50-something battle streak!" 

"Later. I need you to try and get Paula to spill the beans on what she keeps thinking about."

"When are you so nosy all of a sudden?"

"PARAPPA! I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHAT COULD BE SO IMPORTANT TO HER!"

"You like her or something?"

"Oh, shut up."

Parappa just smiled awkwardly. 

"Parappa, please. It can't be as important as hanging out with us."

"Ok,  _dad."_

Matt scowled at Parappa. He hated it when Parappa called him that.  In slight fear, Parappa shuffled towards Paula.

"What?" Paula was still angry about being snapped out of her fantasy. 

"Whatcha been thinking about?" Parappa cocked his head.

"Nothing you need to worry about."

Parappa frowns and turns to Matt while shrugging. Matt sighs as he tosses Parappa's Gameboy back to him. Once he looked at it, he gasped in fear: his prized Manectric was in the red. His fingers started flying at the buttons.

"I gotta crack her somehow..." Matt muttered. 

 


	23. Like an Egg

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parappa comes up with a plan to to get Paula to confess her thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter and the next are basically me rewriting that one episode of the parappa anime that fueled this ship lmao

"...and she just glared at us like we were accusing her of something!" Parappa stated, "I just don't get it."

"It's because your a boy," Pinto teased.

"Whazzat supposed to mean?" The 14-year-old boy looked at his 8-year-old sister funny.

"It means boys don't thinks like girls, bro."

"What's different?"

Pinto just shrugged. Parappa tsked as he eased his sister off his lap: his leg was falling asleep.

"Matt wants nothing to do with anything else," he continued after stretching, "he just wants to get Paula to spit it out!"

"Has he talked to her?" Pinto asked as she fell backwards on her brother's bed.

"Didn't work."

"What about you?"

Parappa shook his head.

"What about Sunny? She's a girl."

Parappa's face went instant tomato.

"What?! I was just saying! My friend tells me her older sister gossips constantly with her friend, and she's a girl! Maybe Paula needs a girl to talk to..."

"Y'know, sis...you might be onto something..."

*** * ***

"Are you sure this will work?" Matt sighed as he stirred at his milkshake. He was growing impatient. 

"It will!" Parappa whined, "trust me, I got advice on this."

Matt gazed at Parappa flatly.

"You turned to your sister for advice again, didn't you?"

Parappa's face turned pink.

"Parapa, she's freakin' eight. What could _she_ know about this-"

"Shush!" 

Parappa bolted at the sight of one pink-haired girl.

"Hi Sunny!" He wasted no time greeting her.

"Hey, Parappa!" Sunny greeted back, causing Parappa's face to glow red, "You called me to meet you here?"

"Oh-yeah! Well, you see..."

Parappa's words got caught in his throat. He still hadn't worked up the courage to talk to the girl of his dreams. He turned around and jumped at the presence of Matt. 

"We, uh...we have a favor to ask..." was all Parappa could say before turning away and covering his face with his beanie. The word "idiot" repeated itself in his brain.

"You know Paula?" Matt asked, the impatience still in his voice. Sunny nodded in slight confusion.

"Somethin's up with her. I wanna know what, but she won't talk to us. So genius over here (he gestured at Parappa) thought you'd be a better candidate for her to open up to. Apparently he thinks girls do that kinda thing."

Parappa groaned loudly at Matt's statement, then ran to hide in the bathroom.

"Look, can you just...talk with her and see if she tells you anything? I'm getting tired of hanging out at this dump."

"I mean...I guess I can..." Sunny sighed, slightly disappointed that Parappa didn't wanna just hang out.

"S-Sunny!" Parappa yelled as he exited the bathroom, "We'll still hang out...we still need to wait on Paula..."

Matt rolled his eyes and went to order another milkshake. "Parappa, this better work. I'm getting antsy."


	24. Deejay Got Me Falling In Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt finally cracks his case.

The four friends all sat together near a window: it was Sunny's suggestion. Matt poked and prodded at his food-he was never really one to like greasy stuff.  _Couldn't have picked somewhere nicer, could you, dude?_ He thought.

But the main reason they were here was sitting right next to him.

"So!" Matt cleared his throat, "How's everybody doing?" He made an attempt to get at least _one_ other person to talk. 

Their table was the only silent one. Parappa was too busy gushing over Sunny to do or say anything, prompting Matt to kick him underneath the table. They exchanged glares. 

"Well, I'm staying at my aunt's next week while my dad goes away for a business trip..." Sunny began, "what about you, Paula?"

"Oh, not a whole lot, really, " Paula sighed while playing with her fries. Matt huffed. What would it take?

"...but I was at Club Fun last Saturday...that DJ is really cute..."

Parappa snapped out of his lovestruck daze when he heard those words. 

"Uh, what's this DJ look like?" He practically spat those words out. 

"It was kinda dark, so I might not be correct, but...his skin was tanned, kinda like Sunny's, but a bit darker, he had auburn hair that was kinda messy...and I'm not entirely sure, but I think he had some freckles on his face..."

Parappa knew exactly who fit that description: all that was missing was the ability to sleep anywhere at anytime, almost like a cat. He motioned for Matt to lean in towards him.

"PJ works at Club Fun on weekends," Parappa whispers, "do you think maybe-"

"Paula?! No way!" Matt whispers back.

"I'm just saying, it's worth a shot..."

Parappa pokes his head out from the conversation. 

"I happen to know who your talking about!" He stated.

"Wait. Really?!" Paula was estatic.

"Yeah!"

"Tell Me! Who is it?"

"...PJ. You know, PJ Berri? Kinda fat, will sleep through a hurricane, almost eats his own weight in everything?"

Paula's smile quickly grew into a frown.

"What? Nah, that can't possibly be right..."

"Well, he fits just about everything else he says!"

"Psh! It probably just looked like him."

" **Paula. I'm serious.** "

Paula fell backwards in her chair. 

"Way to go, Parappa," Matt quipped under his breath, "you broke her."


	25. Maybe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parappa sets PJ and Paula up on a date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last flashback chapter for a while.

"...yeah, she went in a downward spiral of denial when I told her."

"Paula? In love with PJ? Ha!" Katy was quite amused at what her black-haired friend was telling her.

"Katy! I'm serious!" Parappa whined, "why are you laughing?!"

"They hate each other's guts, remember?" Matt indirectly stated.

"Oh yeah..."

"Well, I've gotta bounce. Dance pratice is soon. See ya!" And just like that, Katy left.

*** * ***

"Hey! PJ!" Parappa called out to his friend who lay asleep in the grass.

"Meh..what?" PJ was slightly annoyed, but Parappa was his friend.

"Guess what."

"What?"

Parappa opened his mouth to speak, but then lost his words. How would he put this?

"What?!" PJ was annoyed by his friend waking him up again.

"I was just wondering, would you like to meet someone special tonight?" Parappa finally got words to come to him.

"Oh really?"

Parappa nods.

"And who, pray tell, may this 'special someone' be?"

Parappa motioned PJ to lean in closer.

"You have a secret admirer," Parappa whispered.

*** * ***

"When's Paula gonna get here?" Matt groaned, "I didn't come here to just watch PJ eat his own weight is whatever crap they're serving him."

"She's gonna be here!" Parappa shushed his tall friend. They, Sunny and Katy, were all watching PJ's table from afar. Matt didn't completely trust in Parappa's plan, but Parappa practically begged for Matt's insistence.

"Guys, look!" Sunny called out, interrupting what would have been a quarrel. 

Sure enough, Paula had arrived.

"So..you're PJ Berri," Paula said.

"One and only," PJ replied, trying to sound cool.

"I heard some things about you."

PJ just turned his focus on his food.

"I hope this works..." Parappa muttered.

*** * ***

Back at the park, the six friends met up again.

"So, how was your day?"~ Parappa cheerfully asked.

"Well, I got to know PJ a little bit better," Paula responded, "some things I didn't want to, though..."

"Don't get anything wrong!" PJ interjected, "we're just friends..."

Parappa sighed audibly, his head hanging low. Matt saw this as an "I told you so" moment, but that would just be rubbing salt in the wound.

"I know you had something to do with this," PJ leaned in to his moping friend.

"I'm sorry," Parappa sighed again, "she just seemed really into you-"

"If that's the case, I might give a chance. Just for you."

"Really?!"

PJ nodded.


	26. Take A Break

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PJ didn't have such a good night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mushi is an asshole lmao

**PJ'S POV**

_My phone was blowing up._

_I didn't want to leave her by herself._

_I had no choice._

_Mushi would kill me if I stayed._

_I wouldn't be able to provide for her if I lost this gig._

_I have no way of telling him._

_..._

I'm not a runner. Never have, never will be. But I have no car. I have no other way of getting to Club Fun. King Kong Mushi's gonna be all over me, but I can take it. 

_I'm sorry, Paula. But I have to._

*** * ***

"Bout damn time you showed up!" Mushi raised his voice once I finally made it, "I've run out of stalls. What makes you think you can just show up when you want?"

I was only hyperventilating, but I still raised my hand to face him.

"Never mind, I don't wanna hear it. Get your ass over to that turntable!"

I do as he says, not wanting to anger him any more than he already is.

"Sorry for the wait, folks! PJ DJ is back again! Holla!!!"

His voice just gave me a headache. I just wave a peace sign to the crowd while smiling awkwardly. When Mushi turns away, I slip out of my turntable and run out to his friends. 

Normally I  wouldn't do this, but it feels necessary. 

"Whassup, DJ?" One of Mushi's friends laughs. I just motion for him to shut up.

Mushi's other friend appears zonked out. He wouldn't mind if I just took  _one_ puff from his pipe, right?

_Lord, was that a bad idea._

My headache turned into a migraine. I stumbled backwards, hitting my turntable in the process. I don't feel human anymore. I feel bile raging up in my throat. 

_I blew chunks on the dance floor._

"Caramba, that was a party foul!" I hear a voice call out. 

I'm lying on the floor, holding my stomach and shaking. 

"Yo, you should've said something!" Mushi came to me.

I open my eyes and glare at him.

"Need a ride home?"

I nod. 

"Need a few days away?"

I nod.


	27. I Want To Help.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parappa didn't have that good of a night either.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair Warning: this chapter contains mass hysteria/stress-induced self harm. If that's a trigger, stay away.

**Parappa's POV**

 

**_I've known you forever._ **

**_I thought nothing would ever come between us._ **

**_Then...then this happened._ **

**_Why?_ **

**_Why did this happen?_ **

**_PJ, buddy..._ **

**_What can I do?_ **

**_I wanna help you._ **

 

Scissors are postioned at my throat. I'm sobbing quietly. I can't stop thinking about if and how I can help him.

_What am I doing? I'm 25 years old. I can't wake up my parents like this._

I pull the scissors away, close them, and slam them into the cutting board. Hot tears are streaming down my face. I rush to find the glass tube in my duffel bag. I really need to ease my mind.

*** * ***

A change of scenery is always nice.

Being outside is nicer. 

 _"Parappa, ole boy,"_ I sigh to myself,  _"you're letting things get to your head again."_

I flick the lighter.

Smells like dog.

...

 

_A steak knife is in my hand._

"PJ! Buddy! I don't know what I'm doing!"

I'm barking hysterically. The steak knife is driven into my other arm. 

"Just a little blood, what's that got to do with anything?!"

_I've completely snapped. The drug was just making it worse._

 

"Woof! Woof! Feels like I've really grown up now, huh?!"

I turn and slam the knife into a tree.

"Whatcha gonna do, huh?"

The loss of blood makes me feel faint. 

"I know! I gotta...I gotta..."

_**Thud.** _

*** * ***

"Big brother?"

Pinto's voice snapped me awake. 

"Jesus Christ...what happened last night?" was all I could say.

"It's not morning yet." Pinto told me.

The clock read 3:45am.

"You're lucky I didn't get mom and dad. They really would've worried about you."

I look at my left arm. It was encased in more bandages.

"Y-you did this?" I whisper. Pinto nods.

Something then hits me.

"Su-Sunny!"

I sprang out of my bed and fling my duffel bag onto my shoulder.

"Bro! Where are you going?!" Pinto yells.

"Back to my girl, that's where!"

 


	28. Discussion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parappa comes back to his girl and is greeted by an unexpected guest.

**Parappa's POV**

_Dear God, my head._

_What did I do?_

_Where am I?_

"Parappa? You ok?"

I think I know that voice.

My vision clears up. The voice was that of Sunny's father.

"Uh-General! I don't mean to-uh..." I immediately sprang up and attempt to salute him. Even at this age, he still scares me.

"At ease," he says, "what might you be doing out here? You look awful."

"I feel awful. Thanks a lot," I reply under my breath.

"I heard that. Come inside. That's an order."

*** * ***

"Where's Sunny?" I ask, still groggy from whatever I could've done last night.

"That's not important," the old general replies, "what  _is_ important is that she's told me about what's been eating at you."

"I-oh," was all that came out of my mouth. My head suddenly hangs low, "I'm sorry, but you  _do_ know I didn't just walk out on your daughter, right?"

"My daughter is not the hot issue.  _You are,_ boy," He nudged at me with his cane. 

"General, listen: I know this situation is putting me in a bad shape. I know I'm not as cheery and motivated as I once was. It's just...I've known PJ longer than I have Sunny, you should know that."

"And I should because...?"

"I guess the people you be known longest come first in dire situations. Remember the whole deal with the Noodle Syndicate and how your first instinct was to come to my house and see if my dad could do anything?"

He starts chuckling. At something  _I said._ He's never done that before.

"I suppose you  _do_ have a point." He pats me on my back l, which causes me to wince.

"Sorry. Forgot about that incident you had with Parappa Town's jailbirds."

I turn my focus towards him.

"How much did she tell you?"

"Only what I needed to know."

Awkward silence soon followed.

"Just promise me you won't let things like this go to your head so much that you don't think to take better care of yourself. Whoever my daughter chooses to spend her days with is just as important to me as she is."

He's smiling at me, something he almost never does.

I smile back at him.

"Thanks."

"And before you ask me again, Sunny's still asleep upstairs. Should I wake her up and tell her you're back?"

"No, I'll do it."

I don't know if he knew that what a lie, but I just wanted to curl up in bed with her.

 


	29. A Mess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Paula's outcome on life isn't so positive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This may sound weird, but this chapter can be imagined as if you were there and she was talking to you.

**Paula's POV**

Oh boy. Where do I even start?

I could've _been_ somebody, y'know? I could've put myself out there and left my mark on the world!

But, that's not the case.

When I was...I don't know, 15? I had my first crush. Teenager stuff. He seemed so astonishing and mysterious when I first saw him, and I  _knew_ I hit the jackpot.

Of course, one of his friends decided that it would be a good idea to set me up on a date with him. 

Lemme tell ya, that DJ over at Club Fun? That was my crush. In real life, he's a fat slob, eats his own weight in everything-and I mean  _every fucking thing,_ and he could sleep through the end of the world. 

But since the whole date thing was his friend's idea, he decided to give me a chance. Well, quite a few. We've gone out numerous times, but we've never been "official"

But a few month ago I hooked up with him for the first time in what felt like forever, and now I'm pregnant. And it's his!

What am I gonna do now? I'm not ready for marriage. Don't think I ever will be, either. I wanna keep this kid, even if it _is_ out of wedlock.


	30. Major Visit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PJ and Paula get a visitor.

**Paula's POV**

As usual, PJ is asleep next to me. At this point, I'm used to it.

There's a sudden knock on the old door.

"Lock's broken!" I yell, "Come on in."

 

"This place is a dump."

The voice belonged to Matt Major.

 

"Hey Matt," I lowly reply.

He just sits down in the rickety chair next to me. Nothing more than awkward silence. I glance down in my lap.

"So...how's things with you?" I broke the silence.

"Not a whole lot," he says, "you just weren't in your apartment when I remembered you, so I talked with Parappa and he told me you were here."

My body went cold. How much did he know? I had known him since middle school, but come college he went out of state and it's been hard to keep in touch.

"What's got you living here?" Matt snapped me back in reality.

I just sigh deeply.

"Something's up with you. I just know it."

PJ finally woke up. He grabs his notepad and scribbles something on it.

"Hey Matt. When did you get here?"

"Everything alright with you, Peej?" Matt sighed.

"He..can't talk." I sigh again, "real serious stuff. Nerves or something."

Matt cocked his head.

"Another thing..." I pull up the Club Fun hoodie I was wearing.

"What?"

"Matt. I'm pregnant. And it's PJ's."

You couldn't really tell it, but there  _was_ some indication.

"You can't hide that forever, y'know," Matt stated. 

"This is my life now, unfortunately."

 


	31. Major Pick-Me-Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt helps a few friends in need.

**PJ's POV**

Matt Major? It's been a long time.

I keep getting an itch in my throat. But I don't wanna yell at anyone. Maybe I just wanna talk. Paula is shifting around in the seat next to me. 

"...and I keep telling myself that, life is so sudden now. Part of me doesn't feel ready to be a mother."

"It's really up to you," Matt responds.

"I know, but...it's a child we're talking about. Doesn't feel right to just dump it."

I scoot closer to her. I wrap my arms around her chest, my hands going on her stomach. 

"How do you feel about it, Peej?" Matt interjects. 

I just shrug. 

Matt puts a hand on his chin.

"I understand times are tough for you two. But I just finished college, and I don't feel at home there. If...if I moved in, would you let me help you?"

Paula springs up from her seat. 

"Oh my God, _yes._ You don't understand how desperate I really am. Matthew Major, you are my best friend. If PJ can get help from  _his_ best friend, then DAMMIT, I CAN TOO!"


	32. Major Change Of Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt gets involved in PJ and Paula's situation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! Matt's a main character now.

**Matt's POV**

Paula kept telling me life for her and PJ was so sudden nowadays. I mean, there's not a  _whole lot_ that we can do for it, but, who knows.

"I'm glad that someone else is here for us," Paula sighed while staring at her stomach, "I haven't had the heart to tell PJ this, but...I feel a bit too young to be a mother."

"Really?" I sounded a bit unconvinced, "remind me how old you are again?"

"I'm 28."

"And how old is PJ? Do you feel he's 'too young' to be a father?"

"PJ is 26, I believe, but...this affects me more, y'know? You're a guy...you wouldn't understand."

Almost 30 years old? That's...that's not terribly young at all. For PJ, maybe, but Paula has nothing to worry about! My mother was almost 40 when I was six, so it's honestly your call. But I'm no expert.

"You're not too young!" I come back to Earth, "if anything, your kind of in that in-between gray area."

"You think so?" Paula slightly smiles.

"Besides," I pull up her Club Fun hoodie and orange shirt, "the baby bump looks kinda cute on you."

Paula lightly slaps me on the shoulder, then blushes pretty hard.


	33. Inventions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parappa tries his father's past time to try and help PJ.

**Sunny's POV**

Where's Parappa at this hour? It's really late. I'm really worried.

My worry faded once I saw light through the garage door.

Parappa was inside, sound asleep on the desk. Wouldn't be the first time. He's tried tinkering with stuff like his father from time to time, and most of the time he falls asleep trying. 

"Par, wake up. You need to sleep in a bed," I gently shake him awake.

"but...this needs to be finished..." he sleepily groans, "y'know, I gotta..."

"Yes, I know. You've gotta believe. But you also gotta sleep."

I end up picking him up and carrying him upstairs. (With my father being a retired General, I have gotten a bit stronger than I look.)

 

***time skip, the next morning***

"So, what's the big man working on this time?" I ask once Parappa woke up. 

"Oh yeah!" He he responds, "C'mon, you should see."

*** * ***

There are hundreds of blueprints on the desk in the garage, but the one he pulled out to show me, he did with determination.

"This thing I know will change things," he boasted. The print showed something round.

"Is this something you plan to finish?" I snark.

"Sunny, I'm serious. I'm also doing this for PJ."

His friendship with PJ is as strong as his love for me. I really appreciate it.

"So, what is it?"

"What I wanna do...I wanna give him his voice back."

"So this is like one of voice box thingies?"

He kissed me on the cheek, much like I do to him.

"You are so smart."


	34. Believe This Will Help!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parappa shows PJ his plans.

**PJ's POV**

Ever since Matt decided to stay with us, I feel like Paula seems safer and opens up to us more.

"Knock Knock!" A voice yelled outside.

"Lock's broken!" Paula yells, "Come on in."

"Parappa?" Matt sprang up from his seat, "that really you? Never seen ya bare-headed!"

Matt was right. Not a whole lot of us have seen Parappa bare-headed. 

"Uh, hey Matt," Parappa almost hesitated his words, "been a while, huh?"

I motion for him to sit next to me.

"So, how's things with you?" Parappa asked.

I just put a hand over Paula, slightly pulling up the hoodie on her. She smacks my hand.

"Anyways, I got something that could help you out...if ya want."

"Parappa, why are you talking like this?" Matt interjects.

"Guess I'm just not used to you around anymore," Parappa huffs.

Parappa takes out a blue sheet of paper. 

"I wanna make this, just because speech is important. I mean, you want your kid to never hear their father laugh or cheer, or...snore?"

"Parappa, this is amazing!" Paula says, "how'd you come up with it?"

"My pop's an inventor. Guess I learned from watching and helping him so much."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So! Think a happy ending is coming? Only time will tell...


	35. Majority?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Totally not filler

( **Parappa's POV)**

[ **Aviators: Friendship]**

_I believed_ _what_ _we had would last forever, after all the moments we spent together._  
_Were they meaningless in_ _the_ _end...?_

Matthew Major. Sure has been some years, huh?   
Y'know, it's kinda strange, but...

_If_ _friendship is supposed to be magic, then why has ours become so tragic?_

**Almost feels like** **I** **don't** **even know you anymore**.

_I'm_ _no longer_ _proud_ _to call you my friend..._

**(Matt's POV)**

Why was Parappa acting so strange around me? Not like we've never met or anything.

_Feels like after all this time,_ _you've_ _should_ _have_ _known_ _we'd be here tonight._  
_Wondering where the past has gone: all the memories we lost when we moved on._

Sure, I've gone out of Rodney State for college, people do that.   
Now that I think about it...  
**You were only 17 when I left,** **weren't** **you?**

_Honestly, it hurts thinking about the way we were: just_ _you_ _and me._  
_This_ _isn't_ _what friendship's supposed to be-!_

**(Parappa)**

Things have changed ever since you left. Hell, Paula was half convinced that you wouldn't come back: you were her first friend, after all.  
But...  
Look where she is now...

_Giving_ _up always seemed so easy._  
_But_ _it's_ _hard when_ _it's_ _you and me._  
_And_ _I_ _don't_ _wanna say goodbye..._

I'm not even sure what to say now, honestly. I guess I'm more worried about PJ.

_We've  hurt_ _each_ _other time and time again._  
_I_ _guess_ _all good things come to an end._  
_I_ _don't_ _wanna lose_ _you_ _tonight-!_

It's the same case with you and Paula, kind of.   
PJ was...my first friend.  
I just wanna help him. And Paula.

_Feels like after all this time, I should_ _have_ _known you'd be here tonight._  
_Wondering where the past has gone, all the memories_ _I've_ _lost when I moved on._  
_Honestly, it hurts thinking about the way they were:_ _just_ _she and he._  
_Is this what friendship's supposed to be-?_

Paula, Sunny and I are all PJ have.   
I don't want you out of this, but I almost don't want you in this.

_Don't say goodbye._

I didn't want to admit it, but...  
**Paula** **shouldn't** **leave PJ.**

_I promise, everything will be alright._

**(Matt)**

Paula never really handled news like this well. I understand if she wants out of this.

_Don't_ _leave_ _me!_  
_I'm_ _sorry!_

Strangely enough, she doesn't. Probably just hormones softening her up.  
Makes me **wonder...would I have done the same?**

_I'll_ _fix_ _this_ _, if it costs me my life!_  
_I'm gonna make this right..._


	36. Major Concerns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt is worried about Parappa.

**(Matt's POV)**

"Hey, Peej?"

Paula and PJ are asleep, but I wanna ask PJ some questions.

"Peej. wake up."

Nothing. He's really out of it.   
Then I remembered how Parappa would wake him up.

"I've got donuts."

PJ immediately sprang up, then gave me an annoyed look.

"Peej, I'm sorry I tricked you, but can we talk?"

PJ shrugs.

"Why was Parappa acting so strange around me? Does he not like me anymore?"

PJ shrugs again.

"Where's your notepad and why aren't you using it?" Now I'm the one with the annoyed look.

PJ reaches over the coffee table and pulls out his notepad.

"When I went out of state for college...did Parappa miss me at _all?"_

PJ wrote, " _I know for a fact Paula was depressed when that happened._ _That's_ _when_ _we started being off-and-on partners._ "

"PJ, that's not what I asked. Did Parappa care about me?"

PJ told his notepad to his chest. He sighs, and nods his head no.

"Wait...he didn't miss me?"

PJ wrote, " _Guess not._ "

"Why not?"

PJ shrugs.

"Peej, you're his best friend. You know him better than I do."

"What are you babbling about?" Paula muttered as she woke up.

"Parappa seemed kinda...flat when he noticed I was with you two," I replied, " and I wanna know why."

"Hell if I know," Paula went back to sleep.

Well, _those_ _two_ are big helps. Looks like I'm gonna have to go to the source.


	37. Major Discussion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt invites himself to speak with Parappa.

**(Matt's POV)**

"So, this is where Parappa lives now..."  
I was talking to myself as I looked up.

I rang the doorbell twice before I got an answer.

It wasn't Parappa.

"Oh! You're Parappa's girlfriend, right?"

"Would he have chosen anyone else?" She remarks.

"Ms. Sunny, I'm only looking for Parappa." I cross my arms.

"Remind me again who you are?" Sunny asked.

"Matt Major? Y'know, you and him were two years behind me in high school?"

"Vaugely..."

" **Where is** **your** **boyfriend**."

"In the garage."

***  *  ***

"Knock knock! It's Matt!"

Parappa looked up and dragged his screwdriver.

"What's the deal? Got some beef with me?"

He motioned me to come close.

"Matt, it's not like I don't like you anymore," Parappa sighed, "I'm just putting all my focus into helping PJ and it's kinda messing with my head. My poor Sunny Hunny, she has to do everytying now..."

He buries his face in my chest.

"Parappa, I understand you wanna help. But that doesn't mean you have to put that first. You matter, too. Please make sure to take care of yourself."

"He's right, y'know," Sunny intruded, "we worry about you like you worry about PJ."

Parappa gets up and walks to his girlfriend.

"Par, what are you-"

She was gonna talk, but he interrupted and kissed her. Then he hugged her while softly crying.

"I'm sorry," escapes his mouth, "just feels like I needed to hear that."


	38. Mystery Box

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sunny tags along with Parappa while he picks up something he left back home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Christ, it's been a while since we've seen things from Sunny's side

**(Sunny's POV)**

"You could've just stayed at the house: I told you I wouldn't be gone that long."

"Par, listen, the way you've been acting doesn't make me fully trust you to leave by yourself."

Parappa just rolled his eyes and huffs.

"Where are we even going, anyway?" My arms are crossed.

He didn't answer. His attention was fixed on the road. (Not that that was a bad thing: I'm just trying to monitor him.)

*** * ***

"Uh, what are we doing here?" I looked out my side and noticed we were outside his parents' house.

"Just-I need something for my project and I remembered it was here," Parappa almost hesitated his words. He turned over to me.

"Stop that," he spat out: I was making a pretty judgmental face, "The Sunny Funny I know would _never_ put that kind of stress on her sweet face."

 _Well, these past two weeks you haven't been the Parappa I know,_ I thought.

I move my hand to the door handle, but he squeezed my free arm.

"Uh-uh. You stay here," he stated, "promise I won't be in for very long." 

Almost immediatly after her left the car, his phone went off. A message from Matt read 《WYD?》

I slowly picked it up, then decided I should respond to it.

《This is Sunny. Parappa left his phone.》

《Is he out?》

《Yeah. I went with. Last time he went on his own it wasn't pretty.》

《Where are you two?》

《His old home. Says he needs parts for his project and they're back there.》

《Project? He was awfully hush about that...》

I was startled by tapping on the car window followed by a muffled "open up, please."

Parappa was back, and he was holding a shoebox.

"What's in the box?"

"Parts I need. Nothing to worry about."

I gave another judgemental look.

"I'll tell you when I get home. I promise," he kisses me on the cheek.

*** * ***

"So, what's in the mystery box?" I ask.

He opens the lid slightly, closes it, then almost sheds a tear. 

I cock my head.

"It's...a pretty old thing...a friend, actually..." his voice slightly broke. 

"Oh my God..."

"Yeah...it's what-or who, I should say, you think it is..." 

He falls over and hugs me.


	39. Boombox

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parappa opens the box. Inside? His childhood prized possession.

** Parappa's POV **

I promised Sunny I would show her once we got home, but I had to keep this to myself.

People I love are worrying about me.

Her. PJ. My own family.

I wish they would stop. That's on me, though.

I opened the shoebox and carefully took out its contents. I sigh deeply once I set it on my work table.

"You probably need some batteries..." I muttered while rummaging through a toolbox.

I dusted off the top, then pressed the play button. I prayed that he still worked.

The Sea Boy jingle (slightly distortedly) played. Boxy Boy was still alive after 6 years. I cried, but out of satisfactory joy.

"Woah! How long has it been?!" was the first thing out of Boxy's mouth, "Hey, Parappa, you lookin' fine!" He coughed after finishing that sentence.

"You've missed quite a bit, buddy," I whispered.

Boxy coughed again. (It was actually kind of cute.) "This isn't your house..."

"Well, not the one I grew up in, anyway," I chuckled, "I'm in my 20s now. Sunny's asleep upstairs."

Boxy just looked at me suggestively.

"Aw, Boxy...so much is going on with me right now..."

"What's-*COUGH*-up, big boy?"

"Peej is mute now. I'm trying to help him as much as I can. I'm kind of being an inventor like Pops, y'know?"

I glanced over to the side. The incomplete voice box. I can't take apart my most prized possession from when I was six. Not now. I need more time with him.

**Author's Note:**

> Until the next chapter, keep reading on. Peace peace.


End file.
